Half agony half hope


 

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Growing up... No matter how hard you try you cannot balance everything and make everyone happy. It is not in your hands. Most days you do end up feeling guilty and embarrassed about being selfish. But learning your own capacity and limitations is part of growing up. Accepting the hard truth that some things are out of your control. At the most you can spare a few kind words and maybe not be too harsh or rash in your actions. The aim is to not intentionally hurt anyone. Going at our own pace can be a gamechanger. We aren't built the same. Knowing yourself and adapting is the biggest challenge and the most gratifying experience as well. Forgive yourself and others, for being human, for making mistakes but don't let your boundaries down in a way that you have to sue for damages again.  #reverie
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Another day another reverie

Did my words dry up Did the thoughts finally shrink and shrivel up so much that they refuse to bleed on paper anymore Do I not drink from the fountain of experiences any longer Or perhaps not bring my own cup to the party to fill it to its brim  Do I no longer crave for more Is this what being satiated mean No more yearning Is this also a death perhaps Not the dramatic bloody one But a more dignified complacent quiet one or do I perhaps judge too harshly Myself and my abilities As always my worst critic Twilight whistling past the window No more broken panes of glass But this time a sturdy wooden window Painted brickred with white curtains framing her Small plant tubs line up on the edge Some days a little bird comes by to visit me It doesn't sing of romance and life But of lovely meals and romanticising the mundanes I miss my fervour and our youthful wonder But this fine day nothing irks me more than the lost words  I should have filled the pages of that pretty diary of yours...
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Old friend

Someday soon I'll stop vying for attention I know this familiar feeling Like an old friend with a sad smile on her lips Knowing eyes filled with sympathy and regret Hoped for a better ending this time You and I both Yet we somehow keep running into each other Stuck in this merry-go-round forever Destined to be each other's muses Rejection and me. I couldn't write you letters Ink bleeds me dry I refuse to shed tears over the same old patterns repeating themselves Duty? What of it? Don't feel sorry for me, I beg Your pity is worse than your scorns Such peaceful snores I wanna strangle my dreams Like the last bit of whimsical poetry you tore from me Throw your money and your big words back at you. Carry my rebuttals like a badge of honour Your name on my hands Dried up wounds Baked to your skin Blood and bones Lies and more Light leaving your eyes Innocence shining still The night is quiet Your heartbeats loud My pathos knows no mercy Just like your shrugs. #reverie
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